BlogMatch

Fun with Nick Denton! The blog-maestro-extraordinaire now lays claim to 6,540 blogs (my favorite is "Loose Tit," the blog following Tara Reid exclusively.)

I started thinking about Denton, then I stopped, and then I thought about that magazine HighLights. Remember HighLights? (Fun with a Purpose!) I used to love that magazine. And out came this post.

Even if you never visit these blogs, the quotes are still a hoot.

See if you can match the snarky phrase below with the Denton blog that gave it birth. Be warned, one of these quotes is of my own making and will never get Denton sued. I make no promises on the other six.

When you're done with the quiz, simply flip your monitor upside down to read the answers!

1. " Jessica Simpson continues to give the impression of being single by humping and grinding her way about Vegas."

2. "The first rule about wild animalistic sex sessions: you do no not talk about wild animalistic sex sessions. But gossiping about it is fine, and we’re not about to stop doing that. Ride on, Brad [Pitt and Angelina Jolie], ride on!"

3. "OMGOMGOMG LIND-SAY! Double-L Double-D lost her Sidekick at a party—the very same party Paris Hilton lost her Sidekick at. Is that just crazy or what?!?!? So they like went into a T-Mobile store and straight locked it down for an hour while they picked out new ones, right? And Paris's little dog was all, YAP! and stuff, right? OMG so hot."

4. "We don’t know about the phone calls, but for the record, if we had to work on that Insider show Pat [O'Brien] does, our comparative drug use would make Pat’s look like the Amish equivalent of Henry Rollins’."

5. "And they remembered the old saying 'It's no fun with just alcohol.' Thankfully, [Nicole] Richie was on hand to lend a hand. And a straw. And the mirror."

6. "I’ve been trying to follow up this morning on yesterday’s eentsy-weentsy New York City bombing, but what do we know? Nothing. ... From way of the Guardian: 'Police determined that one of the bombs was the size of a pineapple, the other the size of a lemon.' Well, that’s useful to know! Bombs are apparently like cancer — only able to be measured in units of fruit."

7. "If this movie [The Interpreter] is truly Sydney Pollack’s love letter to the UN (we read that in several places), does that make Sean Penn the on-screen representation of Pollack’s penis, ineffectually penetrating the gaping vagina represented by the UN’s General Assembly? Someone might need to tack on another therapy session each week. Probably us."


A. Defamer

B. Gawker

C. Gizmodo

D. Sploid

E. Screenhead

F. Gridskipper

I know, I skipped Wonkette. Apparently my quiz-making matches my internet browsing habits. I live in D.C. and I still can't get into it. Too much ass-fucking (You'll never catch me saying that again.)